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Mood Swings

by Charlie Siren

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1.
Twenty-Five 02:28
It's three A.M. I haven't had a good night of sleep In at least two weeks but I've got the stereo up It's playing all the right songs I need and tonight I'll be just fine I might be twenty-five, but man I'm still alive Although folks most days just say I'm wasting my time My time I never had much interest in the things people do for money I'd rather spend my time in the van with my friends and a bottle of whiskey I might be twenty-five, but man I'm still alive Although folks most days just say I'm wasting my time My time
2.
The Fabulist 03:11
Look me in the eyes and tell me it's okay And all the feelings that we've grown can just be ripped and torn away Just like the outside of a picture that's been cropped It all feels like a train wreck that we could have stopped Go on You said this time things were different (different) Tell me, did you ever intend to come clean Or is it just that you could never commit to one thing The ground is crumbling beneath my feet Trapped in a hole I didn't dig, two feet wide, and six feet deep Well lately I feel like I've been recovering Or maybe I've grown numb to all this suffering Go on You said this time things were different (different) Tell me, did you ever intend to come clean Or is it just that you could never commit to one thing Take a good hard look Tell me what you see And if the quality would be Of satisfaction to me What I mean, is I need Clarity in the things that you seek and the reasons you keep them from me Go on You said this time things were different (different) Tell me, did you ever intend to come clean Or is it just that you could never commit to one thing
3.
Pull Me Up 02:45
My heart was thrown into the deep end I thought no one could save it A sinking ship into the ocean Why me? She took everything I had and through it all away, laughing while I scream "Will someone save me?" As you emerge out from the shadows Oh how life can be so funny It's like a joke without a punch line to take off the edge Satisfied with emptiness You know just what to say to get the best of me When I drink too much and probably should get lost But when you're here I feel like everything's okay Your perfect smile just seems to fill a goddamn room and I hope that you won't go As three long years run down the tubes You came and pulled me up You're everything I wanted You're everything I wanted You know just what to say to get the best of me When I drink too much and probably should get lost But when you're here I feel like everything's okay Your perfect smile just seems to fill a goddamn room and I hope that you won't go
4.
Unforgiving 01:51
The lies you told and all the callow fuck ups that you made The past is unforgiving, all the lines, they won't erase I feel like you gave up on me so long ago When I look into your eyes I see someone I used to know I'd take you back if I knew that things would change It hurt so bad to watch you go away They said time could mend a broken heart Well I've waited here so long and I'm just falling apart Pick up the pieces and run far away I never knew I'd ever see the day I let go of you and me I let go of everything
5.
Mood Swings 02:45
You know I can't stop grieving For years I know I'll never get back Rather just except it and let the past be the past I'll keep on treading backwards Just to find something that lasts I understand that all good things must end Maybe we all die alone Is it the quest that makes us whole To find a tear that needs a mend Not sure I care to know If all that matters is finding truth Who's to say there is just one way What's the use
6.
So Long 03:00
Day by day I think I'm growing used to The way things change so rapidly I lose my grip so quickly Just help me out I need some room to breathe And in due time I'll forget everything It's like running a hundred miles without a break Sometimes the thought of death can help to ease the pain And when it's over I can't help but feel so numb To all the lies you told and lines that you have drawn Forget the ones who are constantly Holding you back from everything It's like running a hundred miles without a break Sometimes the thought of death can help to ease the pain And when it's over I can't help but feel so numb To all the lies you told and lines that you have drawn Even though I know the outcome Still, I face this train wreck head on Sometimes it feels like you never cared at all Sometimes I wonder why you stayed so long Sometimes if feels like I'm fading away Just like the memories of you and me
7.
Expectation, it's killing you inside Excruciation, all the things that feel right and this sophistry can get the best of me Almost every single time A perfect family, they make me fucking sick You go to church on Sunday, to pray away their sins While you're left feeling lost, all alone, and ashamed Just drown out the bogus bullshit in your mind Stuck in a movie that you wish you could rewind They don't understand the struggle and I know you wish they would But they don't get that I wish they would And I wish that things would change Tell me why can't we all just be the same And I drive til I run out of road til I run out of places to go Yeah Just drown out the bogus bullshit in your mind Stuck in a movie that you wish you could rewind They don't understand the struggle and I know you wish they would But they don't get that I wish they would And I'll drive Til run out of road And I'll drive Til I run out of places to go Just drown out the bogus bullshit in your mind Stuck in a movie that you wish you could rewind They don't understand the struggle and I know you wish they would But they don't get that I wish they would They don't understand the struggle and I know you wish they would But they don't get that
8.
I stood up and fought for something I know what it's like to keep a firm hold on conviction and the things you believe in The hardest part is judgement In which you lack the means to see your flaws So you spew your bullshit all night long You've got an opinion And a mouth that won't stop movin' non-receptive to opposition Shut the fuck up man just listen For a change, act your age You've completely missed the point You don't get it Will you ever realize I'm not listening I don't care about connecting with anyone else I'm so sick of the bullshit Convoluting computer screens with drama in a newsfeed Good for you, you've got something to hide behind To waste the time of others and mine You've got an opinion And a mouth that won't stop movin' non-receptive to opposition Shut the fuck up man just listen For a change, act your age You've completely missed the point You don't get it Will you ever realize I'm not listening
9.
Cravenness 03:07
Do you still think about the old days Before you lost your job and started drinking You used to laugh with her it seemed so happy But all that's been replaced with violence and frustration You can't go back on what you've done Brought out the worst in me and all that I've become I want to watch you sink so far down that you drown Maybe then I'll finally move on We both know you don't have the guts to face the truth You made that clear the last time I saw you And furthermore, I'm glad to know that you're not sorry Because I'd go back for the hatchet the moment it was buried You can't go back on what you've done Brought out the worst in me and all that I've become I want to watch you sink so far down that you drown Maybe then I'll finally move on You can't go back on what you've done Brought out the worst in me and all that I've become I want to watch you sink so far down that you drown Maybe then I'll finally move on
10.
Hopeless and broken and utterly depleted You're every part of everything that's ever been defeated When all you have has turn to dust how quickly would you turn to us How long would it take you to abandon your convictions We've come so far from where we started These thoughts are weighing down on me We've come so far from where we parted Nobody's coming back for me You never speak too honestly You've never had to You fall asleep but you don't dream You're too afraid to You'll never know or even see All the things inside of me You'll never find the things you seek The secrets I keep The writing on the walls have faded just like you convictions We've come so far from where we started These thoughts are weighing down on me We've come so far from where we parted Nobody's coming back for me You never speak too honestly You've never had to You fall asleep but you don't dream You're too afraid to

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released April 22, 2016

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Charlie Siren Minneapolis, Minnesota

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